My Husband is No Idiot!!

In the workplace you are likely to see men in charge. Boardrooms are packed with men in Armani suits, brimming with testosterone and making million dollar deals. The double X chromosome is presented as the flagship of our society.

Throughout the history of humans the male has been the hunter and protector of the group. This is even present in the animal world i.e. bears, wolves, etc.

When it comes to seeing the male in action on the small screen you are likely to do a double take. In American sitcoms the husband is often portrayed as an overweight, beer drinking idiot who spends most of his time with a beer in one hand and the other down his pants. Even more startling is how this classic underachiever is often (not always) paired with a smart, attractive female.

Case in point: According to Jim, King of Queens, Grounded for Life, Til Death, Married with Children, Everybody Loves Raymond and The Munsters.

The world of animation is filled with simple, loud mouth husbands. The Flintstones, Family Guy, Dagwood and The Simpsons.

This is not some new white hot phenomenon. For decades Hollywood has churned out successful shows using this model. The Honeymooners leading role played by Jackie Gleason is a classic example. Gleason played blue collar Ralph Cramden; an ill tempered bully with latent violent tendencies, in the 1955 sitcom.

Night after night millions of viewers tune in and watch husbands with diminished intellect and often protruding bellies on parade. Even of the wife isn’t the best looker you can always count on her hubby being a complete bumbling idiot.

Is art imitating life or has the American public been spoon fed a warped model of marriage that we’ve happily adopted?
~The Warden

2nite

As I stare into the brown eyes of my husband of 2 years I hear Jill Scott slowly announce, I’m the real thing, in stereo. I got a little high, I got a little low. Follow this, melodic flow. I could make it shine, I could make it glow…

The dim light from the sweet ginger peach scented candles dances in those eyes and I watch as a tempting smile spreads across his handsome face. I blush and smile back. As we sip our perfectly chilled wine Eddie playfully notes its’ fresh and fruity flavor, with exaggerated accent of course. We laugh, laugh and laugh some more. We survey the table before us and sigh in sweet anticipation. A crisp spinach salad with feta cheese and olives, cheesy stuffed jumbo shells, grilled shrimp, and some much needed time alone. The sweet limited release Chenin Blanc was an anniversary gift and the perfect companion to our meal. The aromatic garlic bread, olive oil and cracked pepper brushes by me like a warm breeze. Ahhh, delizioso!

We relax and laugh and talk. Jill continues to whisper declarations of love and in the distance I hear the growing sound of the end of my beautiful night approaching like an out of control freighttrain; growing nearer and faster by each passing second. Our 13 month old son is awake and just like that…it was all over.

I climb the stairs, peek into his room and find my creamy brown skinned prince wide awake and screaming in his crib. I returned to my husband who had already pulled the high chair up to our table obviously set for two. We continued our now not so private dinner under the curious eyes of our third child.

As our time together grows longer the possibility of spending time alone has become this mystical creature that only our single counterparts are privy to. My husband works an impossible 12-hour shift that begins shortly before I am off to the races aka the daily and most turbulent schedule of homework, playtime, dinner, bath time and preparation for the day to come.

I vowed to have and to hold but how can I honor this commitment if I never get a chance to even see him?
The Warden